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Suggested Parenting Plan Options

*The following options are dependent upon the age and maturity of the child, pattern of contact with each parent, family lifestyle, and presence of siblings.

1. Parent A - Alternate weekends Saturday and/or Sunday from 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.

and Wednesday evenings from 6:00 p.m. until 8:00 p.m.

Parent B - All other times

2. Parent A - Alternate weekends from Friday at 6:00 p.m. until Sunday at 6:00 p.m.

and Wednesdays from 5:00 p.m. until 8:00 p.m.

Parent B - All other times

3. Parent A - Alternate weekends from Saturday at 8:00 a.m. until Sunday at 8:00 p.m.

and Tuesdays and Thursdays from 5:00 p.m. until 8:00 p.m.

Parent B - All other times

4. Parent A - Alternate weekends from Friday evening until Monday morning and every Wednesday overnight

Parent B - All other times

5. Parent A - Monday afternoon to Wednesday morning

Every Other Weekend (Friday afternoon to Monday morning)

Parent B - Wednesday afternoon to Friday morning

Every Other Weekend (Friday afternoon to Monday morning)

6. Parent A – Saturday evening through Wednesday morning

Parent B - Wednesday afternoon through Saturday evening

7. Alternate Weeks with Parent A and Parent B

Wednesday overnight with the other parent

8. Parent A Two days during the week and Rotating weekends Friday  at 6.00 pm until Monday Morning .

9. A combination of any of the above.

Essential Considerations – for older children

• • It is not unusual for teenagers to be angry or embarrassed by the break-up of their parents and to side with one parent over the other. It is important for both parents to be sensitive to their feelings, yet both parents need to encourage ongoing contact with that parent in spite of these  feelings.
• • Older adolescents may resist a rigid weekly schedule and may prefer to make adjustments in the schedule based on school activities or other extra-curricular activities.
• • Both parents need to support their children’s participation in extra-curricular activities even if it conflicts with their parenting time.
• • Effective parental communication and cooperation are required in order to support adolescents in their school and extra-curricular activities.
• • While input from their child should be considered, it is the final responsibility of the parents to agree upon the parenting plan.
• • Parents should not use the children as messengers, but should communicate directly with one another.
• • Flexibility and communication are keys in maintaining positive parent/child relationships.
• • Parents should not rely upon their children for emotional support.
• • Often teenagers after having lived with one parent wish to spend more time or to live with the other parent. Developmentally this can be appropriate since the adolescent is struggling with forming an identity and often needs to have meaningful contact with the other parent to successfully form their self-concept.

SCHEDULES FOR HOLIDAYS

Holidays legally recognized as school holidays by the State of  Florida , along with Mother=s Day, Father=s Day,

and other frequently celebrated holidays, are included below. Parents may wish to add other holidays and days of special family significance, such as religious holidays and birthdays. Pick-up and drop-off times should be specified. Suggestions for several levels of contact are provided. Schedules for school break periods can be found in the

“Schedules for School Breaks”

New Year’s Day/New Year’s Eve

Options: A One parent has the period from December 31 to January 1 in odd years and the other parent has the same period in even years.

B One parent has extra time scheduled during all or part of the day.

C There is no change from the usual schedule.

Easter Sunday

Options: A One parent has a period of time from Saturday to Sunday in odd years and the other parent has the same period in even years.

B One parent has extra time scheduled during all or part of the day.

C There is no change from the usual schedule.

Mother’s Day/Father’s Day

Options: A Each parent has his/her respective day every year, with perhaps an extra overnight or

weekend.

B One parent has extra time scheduled during all or part of the day.

C There is no change from the usual schedule.

Independence Day

Options: A One parent has the period from July 4 to July 5 in odd years and the other parent has the same period in even years.

B One parent has extra time on or near the holiday.

C There is no change from the usual schedule.

Thanksgiving

Options: A One parent has all or part of the four-day holiday period in even years, and the other parent has the same period in odd years.

B One parent has Thanksgiving Day in even years, and the other parent has the day in odd

years.

C One parent has extra time on the holiday or part of the holiday weekend, or the child

participates in activities with each parent.

D There is no change from the usual schedule.

Christmas

Options: A One parent has the period from midday December 24 until midday on December 25

in even years, and the other parent has this period in odd years. The parent not

having December 24-25 has the children from midday on December 25 until midday

on December 26.

B One parent has extra time on the holiday or part of the holiday weekend, or the child

participates in activities with each parent.

C There is no change from the usual schedule.

Monday and Friday Holidays

Options: A The parent with the weekend adds the Monday or Friday holiday to the weekend.

B Each individual Monday or Friday holiday is assigned to one parent in odd years

and the other parent in even years.

C One parent has additional time on all or some of the Monday and Friday holidays.

D There is no change from the usual schedule.

*Parents may agree on any combination of the above

Essential Considerations – Schedules for Holidays

•  It is important for children to experience holidays with both parents and to develop holiday traditions with each parent and extended family as much as is possible.
•  Parents should remember that whatever the relationship between the parents may be, the children probably want to acknowledge holidays and special days with both parents and may need the help of both parents to do so.
•  It is critical for both parents to have the child’s school schedule available when making holiday parenting plans.
•  Holiday traditions involving travel to family gatherings should be considered when dividing holiday time. When travel or distance are issues, longer blocks of holiday time in alternating years may allow the children to participate fully in holiday activities with a parent or extended family members who live far away. Parents should be prepared to be flexible when holiday share plans involve travel.
•  Parents spending a holiday with a child may wish to facilitate some contact, such as a telephone call with the other parent on the holiday or special day.
•  Participation in holiday activities, such as choosing gifts, etc., may mean that parents, regardless of their conflicts, must work cooperatively in the best interest of the children.
•  Parents should keep in mind the ages and needs of children when forming holiday parenting plans. Holidays are extremely important to younger school-age children. Infants and toddlers may be unaware of the holiday and their presence at family gatherings may be more important to the adults. Older adolescents and teenagers may be less excited about holidays and holiday activities than younger children.
•  Safety and enjoyment of the holiday should be the primary concern when planning holiday times with children.

SCHEDULES FOR SCHOOL BREAKS

(School breaks include off-track breaks, winter break, spring break, and summer break.)

Children of all ages benefit when parents establish a "business-like" (the business of parenting)

method of communication. This allows parents to communicate clearly and courteously with each other about the children. When parents give each other as much advance notice as possible regarding vacation plans, this eliminates the potential conflict for the child. It is also helpful for parents to take into consideration the child's regularly scheduled activities or summer school dates prior to finalizing vacation plans.

Vacations, holidays and special days usually take priority over the regular parenting schedule,

without making up the lost time. Afterwards, the parents should return to their regular parenting

schedule.

Infancy to 3 Years Old

Options: A Presuming that one (1) regular weekly overnight has been ongoing, infants to 18-

month olds may have three (3) consecutive overnights.

B Presuming that two (2) non-consecutive overnights have been ongoing, 18 months to

3 year olds may have two (2) seven (7) day periods of vacation time, separated by at

least four (4) weeks of the regular schedule.

C If the child has older siblings, he or she may adjust to longer periods of vacation time

which may be arranged on an individual basis by the parents.

D For child with little attachment to one parent, vacation time should not vary significantly from the regular weekly schedule.

3 to 5 Years Old

Options: A Each parent to have up to ten (10) days of vacation

B Each parent to have two (2) one (1) week periods of non-consecutive vacation time with the child.

C If the child has older siblings he or she may adjust to longer periods of vacation time.

6 to 11 Years Old

Options: A For children from 6 to 8 years old, each parent may have two (2) two (2) week periods of vacation (non-consecutive)

B For children age 6 and older, parents may alternate weeks during the school break periods

C For children 8 years and older, each parent may have up to four (4) consecutive weeks of vacation time.

D For children 8 years and older, parents may alternate the months of July and August each year.

E For children 8 years and older attending non-traditional school, parents may share all off-track periods equally throughout the year.

12 to 18 Years Old

Options: A Each parent to have two (2) two (2) week periods of vacation.

B Parents may alternate weeks of all vacation periods.

C Each parent to have up to four (4) consecutive weeks of vacation each year.

D Parents may alternate the months of July and August each summer.

E For children attending non-traditional school, parents may share all off-track periods equally throughout the year.

*Parents may agree on any combination of the above

Essential Considerations – Schedules for School Breaks

• • Each parent to give the other parent thirty (30) days advance written notice as to vacation dates, destination, and phone numbers of where the child and parent can be reached.
• • Telephone contact is recommended to increase the child’s sense of continuity and security during the out-of-town vacation time.
• • If the child is in town during a four (4) week vacation period, the non-vacationing parent may want to arrange a weekend or mid-week contact with the child.
• • Parents should give consideration to the child’s activities during the summer before making final vacation plans in order to avoid conflict in schedules.
• • Older adolescents may resist a rigid vacation schedule and may wish to express their ideas for a summer schedule that includes their activities and interests.
• • It is critical for both parents to have the child’s school schedule available before discussing vacation and school break plans.  

SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES

AFFECTING PARENTAL CONTACT

The aforementioned parenting plans do not apply to all family situations or all children. They may not be appropriate if there are significant issues of:

• • Child Abuse or Neglect
• • Serious Mental or Emotional Disorders
• • Drug/Alcohol Abuse or Criminal Activity
• • Domestic Violence
• • Continuous Levels of Very Intense Parental Conflict

When a child’s physical or emotional safety is at risk, it is necessary to protect the child. Parents who have concerns about these issues should seek help from an attorney, mental health professional, court services, domestic abuse agency, or local social service agency.

When choosing a parenting plan, parents should consider the child’s relationship with each parent. If a parent has never been a part of a child’s life or has not had contact with the child for an extended period, access should start slowly and gradually increase as the child adjusts and feels comfortable.

Children Benefit When Parents……

𐂾 Initiate the child’s contact with the other parent on a regular basis by phone, letter, audio and

videotapes, e-mail and other forms of communication.

𐂾 Maintain predictable schedules

𐂾 Are prompt and have children ready at exchange time

𐂾 Avoid any communication that may lead to a conflict at exchange time

𐂾 Ensure smooth transitions by assuring the children that they support their relationship with the

other parent and trust the other’s parenting skills

𐂾 Allow the children to carry “important” items such as clothing, toys, and security blankets with

them between the parents’ homes

𐂾 Follow similar routines for mealtime, bedtime, and homework time

𐂾 Handle rules and discipline in similar ways

𐂾 Support contact with grandparents and other extended family so the children do not experience a

sense of loss

𐂾 Are flexible so the child can take advantage of opportunities to participate in special family

celebrations or events

𐂾 Give as much advance notice as possible to the other parent about special occasions

𐂾 Provide an itinerary of travel dates, destination, and places where the child or parent can be reached

when on vacation

𐂾 Establish a workable, respectful method of communication

𐂾 Plan their vacations around the child’s regularly scheduled activities.

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